


We Should Have Run

by Alondere



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: (i think), Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Baby Harry Potter, Box of Memories, Canon Compliant, Crying, Death, Grieving Remus Lupin, Hurt/Comfort, Memories, Minor James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Multi, Nonbinary Nymphadora Tonks, Sirius Black & James Potter Friendship, Sirius Black & Lily Evans Potter Friendship, The Battle of Hogwarts, Writing Competition Entry, life after death, mostly - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-17
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-26 09:08:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30103632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alondere/pseuds/Alondere
Summary: Remus reflects on the past, only to he met with a surprise.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 16





	We Should Have Run

**Author's Note:**

> This is the Instagram writing contest, limit was 3000 words, prompts were, object of sentimental value, a place of meaning somewhere in the story, or flashback, memory, or reflection of the past. I used the memory prompt, but kind of mixed it with the object of sentimental value prompt (I was told this was okay bc the memories were the main focus of the story)
> 
> I made the afterlife start a a turning point in your life (like how Harry’s was platform nine and 3/4, you’ll see what I mean when you read)

Remus sat on the floor of Grimmauld Place, going through the box in Sirius’ room. It was the nineteenth of June, 1996.

He shifted the objects in the box, looking for one thing. When he found it, he covered his mouth, barely stifling a cry. A black leather jacket, Sirius’ name stitched into the collar.

He closed his eyes, hugging the faded leather jacket, his heart squeezing. A memory flashed behind his eyes.

_“Come on, Moony!”_

_“Pads, why can’t you just learn to do it?”_

_Remus was exasperated, he was tired, he had homework to finish._

_“Because, you would do it best! James and I want it to match completely! Please,” Sirius gave Remus puppy eyes._

_“They’re different colors!”_

_“Yes, black and brown, but the rest of them are matching!”_

_Remus sighed and buried his face in his hands, trying not to smile at Sirius’ petulance._

_“Okay, fine, you daft mutt.”_

_Sirius cheered and sat down next to Remus, wrapping his arms around him to watch. Remus shook his head, though he smiled, and started stitching the names into the collar, while Sirius watched and peppered him with kisses, thanking him over and over._

Remus set the leather jacket aside, blinking back tears, trying not to think about what he’d never have again. He moved aside a couple letters. He scoffed softly at the rainbow shot glass he found, smiling a little. 

_“Come on Moony, just a sip!”_

_“James!”_

_“Who the hell is James?”_

_It was about a week after the Marauders had come up with nicknames for each other, two weeks after they’d become Animagi. James and Sirius wouldn’t be called anything other than ‘Prongs’, ‘Pads’, or ‘Padfoot’._

_“Sirius!”_

_Remus rolled his eyes as Sirius turned away from him. “Who?”_

_Remus stuck his tongue out at Sirius and turned back to his book. He had gotten through one page before it was yanked from his hands. He glared up at Sirius._

_“Yes?”_

_Sirius put his hands on his hips. “You need to loosen up, so I decree that you will drink this shot.”_

_Remus rolled his eyes as Sirius handed him the rainbow glass. What other shot glass had he expected from Sirius Black and James ‘third wheeling in an effort to be supportive’ Potter? “This is peer pressure, y’know.”_

_James sat on his other side. “So?”_

_Remus rolled his eyes again as he downed the shot. “So… you two are taking advantage of my good nature.”_

_Sirius kissed his cheek and said, “More like your shy, can’t say no unless it’s really bad, nature. Don’t worry, you’ll live.”_

_Remus gave a long suffering sigh and laid his head on Sirius’ shoulder. “You’re lucky I love you.”_

_Sirius kissed his forehead. “Aren’t I?”_

_James laid his head on Remus’ other shoulder and said, “Yes, I am,” making Sirius and Remus snort._

Remus wiped a tear from his eye and kept going. There was a dead flower crown, it very clearly died with its owner. He almost tried it on, but decided not to, not wanting to deal with seeing it alive and thriving on his nightstand, while the ones who wore it and the one who made it were long gone. Lily had made it, he thought with a small sob.

She’d made it of lilies and roses, saying it’d look so good in James’ hair. Sirius had enthusiastically agreed, when he saw. He hugged Remus and said, _“Doesn’t it just look perfect, Moony?”_

_Remus kissed Sirius and said, “You’re perfect.”_

_James had sat up, wearing the flower crown as Lily braided more flowers into his hair. “Oi, we’re talking about me, here!”_

_Remus turned to James with a wicked smile on his face. “You’re perfect, too, Jamie. C’mere!”_

_He crawled towards James, who shrieked and tried to crawl away. He placed a large and wet kiss on James’ lips, who grimaced and shouted, “Pads!”_

_Remus felt hands on his hips and turned around. “Bad Moony,” Sirius said playfully and sternly._

_Remus playfully stuck his tongue out at him and sat back down in his lap, completely at ease, comfortable, for once. He’d go back to his usual, as Sirius phrased it ‘fun hating, swotty, tight arse’ attitude later. “He wanted it.”_

_Sirius kissed his cheek and hugged him close. “I’m sure he did. You don’t just kiss people who want it, though. Can you imagine me doing that to everyone who wants me to?”_

_Sirius was always there to let Remus loosen up when he needed to, essentially taking his place._

_Remus shrugged. “You do when it’s Prongs.”_

_Sirius took one look at James and rolled his eyes, smiling. “Fine, only when it’s Prongs.”_

_“Oi, what about my feelings!? Just because I don’t show it, doesn’t mean they aren’t there!”_

_Sirius and Remus exchanged a smile and both crawled forward, attacking James with a hug from each side and a kiss on each cheek._

_Lily smiled behind them, realizing just how much she loved her idiots._

Remus smiled, blinking away even more tears in his eyes. There were a few things left.

He gasped softly as he looked at the little music box. He opened it and covered his mouth, slumping against the wall as four big holes in his chest made themselves known. He gasped a little louder, unable to breathe from the inescapable pressure.

Five animals, connected to something inside the box and running through a little maze of the forbidden forest. This would be what broke him, he thought as he covered his face, biting his lip.

A doe, a stag, a large black dog, a large gray wolf, and a large grayish rat.

He closed his eyes, covering his mouth, as a little piano played Bohemian Rhapsody as they ‘ran’ through the forest.

He frantically tried to wipe the tears away, remembering the last time he saw the box opened on the Evans-Potters’ mantle.

_“He’s beautiful.”_

_James was sitting on the couch, teary-eyed, ruffling his messy black hair and adjusting his glasses. “I know, I made a good thing.”_

_“Hey,” Lily called from the kitchen, “I made a good thing, you helped.”_

_Remus covered his eyes, smiling as he exclaimeda, “We don’t need the details of how Harry was made, thank you!”_

_Sirius bent over the crib as Harry watched with wide green eyes. Lily’s eyes. “Can I hold him?”_

_James nodded, covering his face and smiling. He was leaned back in his chair and Lily came in, completely dressed in sweats and her long red hair in a messy bun. She nudged his arm and served him tea, passing Remus his coffee._

_“Thank you,” Remus whispered, watching Sirius cradle Harry in his arms. He was such a natural with kids, likely because he was just an overgrown child, Remus knew he’d be perfect as Harry’s godfather._

_“Moony, I want one.”_

_Remus laughed softly and sipped his coffee. “I hope you plan on birthing it.”_

_Sirius smiled wider and said, “No! Not like that! I want to adopt.”_

_Remus sighed, knowing he’d have this conversation a million more times. “Pads, we will, I swear we’ll adopt. But—”_

_“After the war, I know,” Sirius grumbled, “They had one!”_

_Remus rubbed his face as Lily added, “Harry was an accident. A happy one, but still.”_

_Remus closed his eyes. “I’m sorry, but we can’t accidentally adopt.”_

_Sirius noticed Remus’ slight distress and sat next to him, carefully holding Harry out to him. “We should all just run away,” he muttered to himself, though they all heard and ignored it._

_They couldn’t. Even Sirius knew that, he was the proudest Gryffindor in the room, knew it would be cowardice._

_Remus exhaled at Sirius’ words before focusing on Harry, a bit scared of dropping him or accidentally killing him, merely with his touch. He awkwardly tried to shift to take Harry. Lily watched closely and was at Remus’ side in a second, seeing his discomfort._

_“Hokay, Sirius, hand him over.”_

_Remus looked up at Lily as she held Harry, very clearly protective of him and even more clearly a natural at being a mother. She carefully placed Harry in Remus’ arms, who was almost surprised at the weight in his arms. The warm and breathing weight that was currently staring up at him with curious eyes._

_“He’s… oh wow, this is a literal human baby.”_

_Lily smiled. “He is. Be careful.”_

_She sat next to Remus, playing with Harry’s hair that he was somehow born with, as Sirius got up._

_He walked to the music box and opened it on James’ mantle. Remus laughed as Sirius started slowly dancing to the music. James got up, as did Lily, and they danced._

_Remus looked around, confused. “Where’s Wormy?”_

_James looked around, frowning, and shrugged. “I think he’s visiting his sick mum.”_

_Remus nodded, thinking about seeing Ms. Pettigrew earlier that day, doing her shopping and asking if he’d seen Peter much, because she hadn’t. He decided to tell Sirius about it later._

_Remus took the opportunity of no one watching to shift Harry up and whisper into his shoulder, “You’ll be safe. I promise. Can you trust your Uncle Moony?”_

_He watched the scene before him, recognizing the darker undertones of the seemingly happy scene before them. Bohemian Rhapsody._

_It’s like they were saying goodbye to their last few happy days._

_Maybe they should run away._

_Harry cooed and tried to grab Remus’ hair, almost as if confirming that his idea was a good one._

Remus set aside the music box, wiping his eyes. He wished to this day he’d taken Sirius and run. He came across the final object. Well, the final objects.

Remus stifled a sob as he picked up the little plushies. A black dog, it’s tongue out, a gray wolf whose amber eyes followed the black dog, who looked at the wolf just the same, so they were always together. A stag whose eyes followed a doe, and vice versa, the stag looked magnificent, with hazel eyes and straight posture, even while made of cotton, while the doe looked gorgeous, her green eyes shining and white specks on her face imitating her real freckles. A gray-brown rat.

The rat, even as a stuffed animal, looked almost evil. Like he was plotting the Marauders’ demise, even when he was made.

That Christmas was beautiful, a shining beacon in a dark abyss of an ocean that they were all forced by Dumbledore’s strings to swim downwards into.

He hugged the dog, stag, and doe close, closing his eyes and crying silently, biting his lip, mourning the life they never got.

_Sirius had the package behind his back, an excited Harry staring at him with big eyes._

_“Ready?”_

_Harry clapped, barely able to contain his excitement as he shouted, “Yes, Uncoo Pa’foo!”_

_Remus smiled, wearing a cozy sweater and drinking some tea from a cat mug that Lily got for him to make Sirius angry._

_He’d gotten Sirius the pajamas and leather jacket he was wearing, spending all of his pocket money for one month, before getting Lily’s presents the next month, her favorite book, with spells put on it to make it indestructible, and a new denim jacket. He’d gotten James, the next month, Muggle hair gel as a joke, and then the nicest pajamas he could afford, plus a somewhat ugly red and gold jacket that James wore proudly._

_They had all chipped in for the stuffed animals, then James bought Harry ten more presents with Lily, plus twenty behind her back._

_Sirius took the Padfoot and Moony plushies out from behind his back, while James had the Prongs, Prongsette, and Wormy._

_Harry clapped loudly and ran forward. Sirius held his finger up._

_“One last present from Uncle Padfoot and Uncle Moony!”_

_Remus smiled behind his cup, a little confused. He knew what it was, but couldn’t remember Sirius going out to get it._

_Maybe he got it while Remus was away._

_Sirius brought out the toy broom, proudly announcing as Lily hit Remus’ arm, “Your very own broom!”_

_Harry got up excitedly and Sirius handed him the broom._

_They all watched, smiling widely, as Harry excitedly took the broom and mounted it, just like his father. James slid to his side and helped him, adjusting the settings so he wouldn’t fly too high._

_Sirius sat by Lily, immediately hit in the head by her._

_“We were waiting for him to turn two, Sirius!”_

_Sirius shrugged, laughing. “We beat you to it!”_

_Remus took the plushies and carefully sat them in the crib._

_He turned back to the other two. “Now, he’ll never be alone.”_

_Sirius and Lily both smiled at him, a little sadly, both getting the double meaning._

_They should have run away. Now they were too deep into the war to even think about it again._

Remus felt a hand on his shoulder, so he turned around, looking up.

A teenage Sirius, almost glowing, stood behind him. Remus, looking old and tired, stared, unbelieving at the miracle in front of him. A million emotions crashed over him at once.

This had never happened before, not how he remembered his final goodbye every night after he went to sleep. Sirius knelt before him.

“Hey, Moony.”

Remus, feeling small, even though he was taller than this version of Sirius, not to mention bigger, did the only thing he could, “Si-Sirius?”

Sirius smiled and held his arms out. Remus darted into his arms, burying his face in his hair, a whimper turning to a cry, a cry, a wail.

“You’re here, you’re here, it’s never ended like this, h-how—”

“Hey, I’ve come to take you home. Stop being a girl’s blouse about it.”

Remus laughed shakily and squeezed Sirius, Sirius, warm and young and breathing and happy, before his words registered in Remus’ head.

“Take me home,” he asked slowly.

Sirius nodded and sat down with Remus still in his arms. “Come on, let’s talk. Then, we can go home, yeah? To Prongs and Lils. What do you remember?”

Remus frowned, before he suddenly remembered, far too suddenly. “Woah. Is this supposed to be happening?”

Sirius nodded and kissed his cheek. “Moony, I’ve been practicing this for two years, hoping that I’d get at least thirty. I know what I’m doing.”

Remus nodded and started, “I was fighting in the battle with Tonks. Oh, my God, I didn’t mean that, Sirius, we had a deal, we were only—”

“I know, Moony, I saw it all, even saw you two find a donor for Teddy, who's adorable by the way. Can't wait to meet him, though I won’t say no to waiting a while.”

Remus smiled and wiped his eyes again. “Neither would I. I wouldn’t say no to not seeing Tonks for a while, either.”

Sirius looked a bit sad for a second, before smiling again. “Let’s talk about that later. Continue.”

“Dolohov. He came around a corner, holding a knife. It must have been silver. All I remember is his face coming at me, a burning and cold sensation. Well, the wound burned, but I got cold.”

Sirius nodded encouragingly. “Then?”

Tonks… “They’d laid me down in a corner, they were crying. I couldn’t survive. I remember feeling the knife pulled out as I… faded?”

Sirius nodded, his gray eyes shining. “There’s one more thing, Moony.”

Remus thought, really concentrating. “Tonks ran off, swearing revenge. Then… they fell.”

Sirius nodded slowly as Remus realized he wasn’t sad. He simply accepted it, though still registering that Teddy wouldn’t have a mother or a father.

He’d have Harry and Andy.

“Why…”

“Besides the initial shock of seeing the dead, ooh, scary, you can’t feel anything negative once you realize you’re here. It’s all happiness from here on, I promise.”

Remus shakily sighed at the familiar words, more out of habit than actual emotion.

“You’re here to take me home?”

Sirius nodded, beaming and tracing a scar on Remus’ face. “Yes. Though, I won’t lie, I’m sure it looks terrible that you’re this much older than me right now.”

Remus smiled and replied, “Well, how do I change it?”

“Here,” he snapped his fingers and gently pulled Remus to the mirror he’d summoned, “You can get rid of your scars, but…”

“But?”

Sirius got behind Remus and smiled at him in the mirror. “Never mind, they’re yours to get rid of.”

Remus carefully looked in the mirror, staring at himself changing, before he was met with an unscarred version of his seventeen year old self.

It didn’t look right, it looked… wrong. But why?

“Ah. That looks…”

“Not like you,” Sirius finished for him.

Remus nodded and made them appear again. Sirius, now taller than him again, kissed his forehead.

“Beautiful. Perfect. Gorgeous.”

Remus smiled softly and tilted his head up for a kiss. Sirius obliged, pressing their lips together. Everything, everything, from the past two years, seemed to be poured into the kiss. Sirius grabbed his waist and pulled him closer. When they pulled away, Remus whispered, “I thought I lost you forever.”

“Because you did, Moony,” Sirius replied bluntly.

Remus smiled softly at his unchanged and candid manner. “But now I didn’t?”

Sirius nodded and kissed Remus again, just to kiss him. “Yes, and now we have eternity. Several, if you want.”

Remus hugged him and closed his eyes. “Thank Merlin, the past eighteen years have only been a never ending nightmare.”

Sirius smiled. “I have to make up for it, make sure that Heaven makes up for Hell.”

Remus kissed him again and sighed, completely content.

“Come on, I’ll take you home.”

Remus softly laughed and followed him, letting himself be pulled beyond Sirius’ room in Grimmauld Place. “What else is new?”

Sirius pulled him close, kissing his nose and saying, “Prongsy and Lily are going to be thrilled to see you. They waited almost seventeen whole years.”

Remus ran ahead of Sirius, towards the familiar castle in the distance, and shouted over his shoulder, “Then let’s not keep them waiting any longer!”

He heard Sirius follow him and raced him.

_Home._


End file.
